Mommy diary: page 16

Day 34

Take it day by day, they say.

Time heals all wounds, they say.

Everything happens for a reason, they say.

I say, it's been 34 days and it still feels like the first day. 

I say, time just goes by slower, my nights seem longer because I go to bed and think about her  and the days only go by fast if I am keeping busy. 

My goal each day is to do enough to keep my mind preoccupied so that the empty part of me is temporarily filled. 

I say, I don't care what the reason was, it isn't fair. 

I take that back, I care. 

Because I was left empty, there is a missing piece of me now and that hollowness echoes with ache.