I'm not sure I can take another dr visit in a clinic filled with babies and soon to be mommies. I understand that Post miscarriage follow up care is a necessity, but at this point I'm fed up and tired of holding back my tears for the sake of looking like the crazy lady in the corner that loses it the very second a baby is in her presence.
I have to do lab work every other day, sit in a waiting room for 30-45 mins while my labs are checked and then kindly smile to all the nurses who know I've miscarried and can't help themselves, but apologize and give me their condolences every time I see them.
If miscarriage is such a common thing like they've tried to drill in my head over and over .... Why haven't they made a separate little bubble for me to wait in, away from everyone.
One day, soon I hope, I will be able to be happy for those soon to be mommies and I will once again get that excitement and happiness that babies once brought to me. Today, isn't that day and tomorrow probably won't be either. Because all I want is my baby.
I am pretty sure my anxiety/grief/pain/disappointment/frustration was written all over my face today because my main nurse (God bless her heart) told me I can skip my Friday appt and that she would see me Monday! A little break for me and a big break for this heart of mine that still aches like it was yesterday.
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